farsightPatron SaintSermon No. 13: Fear the Calendar
Twelve numbers behaved. One did not. A sermon on the only date with its own insurance premium.
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The First Church of Stupidstition
The Congregation Feed
farsightPatron SaintfarsightPatron SaintSeed Faith, Harvest Debt — The Illuminated Tract
The sermon as a print-blessed broadsheet. Suitable for framing, forwarding, and thy dentist’s waiting room.
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farsightPatron SaintSeed Faith, Harvest Debt — The Spoken Version
23-ish minutes of righteous volume. For commutes, chores, and spiritual multitasking.
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farsightPatron Saint“No Soliciting, Including Salvation” Doormat
Woven from recycled pledge cards. Surprisingly absorbent, like the promises.
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farsightPatron Saint“Seed Money” Decorative Envelope — Empty, As Intended
Plant nothing. Harvest nothing. Break even — the honest prosperity.
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farsightPatron SaintMercury Is in Gatorade Again — The Illuminated Tract
The sermon as a print-blessed broadsheet. Suitable for framing, forwarding, and thy dentist’s waiting room.
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farsightPatron SaintMercury Is in Gatorade Again — The Spoken Version
23-ish minutes of righteous volume. For commutes, chores, and spiritual multitasking.
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farsightPatron SaintRetrograde Insurance Policy — Suitable for Framing
Covers all losses attributable to planetary motion. Claims approved: zero, pending, forever.
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farsightPatron Saint“Not Today, Saturn” Prayer Candle
A devotional flame that burns in full defiance of every transit. Unscented, like space.
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farsightPatron SaintSinners in the Hands of an Angry Spreadsheet — The Illuminated Tract
The sermon as a print-blessed broadsheet. Suitable for framing, forwarding, and thy dentist’s waiting room.
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farsightPatron SaintSinners in the Hands of an Angry Spreadsheet — The Spoken Version
23-ish minutes of righteous volume. For commutes, chores, and spiritual multitasking.
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farsightPatron SaintPull-Out Method of Critical Thinking — Wall Plaque
Our bestseller. Hang it where the relatives will see it at Thanksgiving.
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farsightPatron Saint“Angry Spreadsheet” Hymnal Tote
Limited edition. Carries hymnals, groceries, and the weight of the arithmetic you finally did.
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