Consider the mirror: a device that shows you yourself, which is already risky. Break one, and the universe — a famously reasonable landlord — bills you seven years of bad luck, compounding daily, no refunds, no proration for good behavior.
Seven years! You can depreciate a tractor faster than that. Our legal ministry has petitioned the cosmos for a payment plan and received, to date, one (1) ominous breeze.
The evidence
The church evidence locker retained three photographs of a single mirror’s descent into liability. Study them. Weep responsibly.
Conclusion: do not break mirrors. If you must break something, break bread — the penalty is crumbs, and the interest rate is butter.
The congregation responds