{"id":89,"date":"2026-07-11T15:11:22","date_gmt":"2026-07-11T15:11:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stupidstition.wtf\/index.php\/join-the-flock\/"},"modified":"2026-07-11T15:11:22","modified_gmt":"2026-07-11T15:11:22","slug":"join-the-flock","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/stupidstition.wtf\/index.php\/join-the-flock\/","title":{"rendered":"Join the Flock"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"cf2-treasury\"><div class=\"cf2-card cf2-card-dark cf2-exchange\"><span>Divine exchange rate<\/span><b>$1 = 10 \u2726<\/b><p>Fixed by decree. The rate does not float; the rate believes. No refunds, per doctrine \u00a71.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"cf2-packs\"><div class=\"cf2-pack\"><span>The Widow&#039;s Mite<\/span><b>$5<\/b><i>50 \u2726<\/i><p>+ 1 guilt offset. Small, but the Lord keeps receipts.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"cf2-pack\"><span>Prosperity Starter<\/span><b>$20<\/b><i>200 \u2726<\/i><p>+ 10% bonus smug. Our most blessed bundle.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"cf2-pack\"><span>Simony Deluxe<\/span><b>$100<\/b><i>1,000 \u2726<\/i><p>+ crest flame element. Historically problematic; currently on sale.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"cf2-pack\"><span>Rapture Insurance<\/span><b>$500<\/b><i>5,000 \u2726<\/i><p>+ front-row seating at the event (venue TBD, eternally).<\/p><\/div><\/div><p class=\"cf2-fine\">Halos are not legal tender, securities, or salvation. The exchange window only opens inward, like certain doors. Card via Stripe \u00b7 PayPal \u00b7 Venmo \u00b7 Crypto (render unto CoinBase).<\/p><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-89","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/stupidstition.wtf\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/89","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/stupidstition.wtf\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/stupidstition.wtf\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stupidstition.wtf\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/stupidstition.wtf\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=89"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/stupidstition.wtf\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/89\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/stupidstition.wtf\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=89"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}